Interview #1 - Eli Vega

 

    I first met Eli Vega (aka Moose) at a hiking event I organized toward the end of 2019. He came along with his partner, Geo, and we became fast friends. I enjoyed getting to know him as he came out to my events and he is easy to have intimate moments around. He is both a long-hauler as well as someone who got re-infected by Covid, and I am honored to include his thoughts and perspective to Language Of Love.

    What was your initial reaction to Covid, especially when Gov. Newsom ordered the first shut down? Had you heard about Covid before the shut down?

    I had caught COVID a week before the shutdown. When the order was given, I was already self-quarantined. I was working at a hospital, doing IT work. We had been keeping an eye on it with the limited info at the time, just waiting for our first confirmed cases to come in. My initial reaction was the feeling of “damn, shit just got real and I am unprepared.” I wasn’t feeling great before, so I didn’t get out to restock necessities, then when it hit, I had zero chance of getting some basics like toilet paper and antibacterial wipes. I had some stocked already, but then stock dwindled and I found myself rationing. Working at a hospital, things like antibacterial wipes are a necessity. Until my immune system got stronger (from a previous circumstance), for my first eighteen months, I was sick every six weeks with something I got from work. I got in the habit of self-isolating at home, trying to prevent spread of what I picked up. So, when my initial symptoms came in, per usual I self-isolated from family. I wiped all surfaces and was able to contain it to just me with no household spread.

   How was the adjustment to being safer-at-home for you? What was your observation of those around you and their level of care and/or apathy?

    Safer at home has had several stages. We’ve been quarantined three times totaling 72 days on top of the social isolation. Being a social creature, in the “Before Days”… I was always go go go, meeting friends for coffee and getting personal connection with others. I miss those bear hugs... Oh but we can still be social online, everybody says. I do IT for a living, so the last thing I want to do is socialize over a computer. I completely disconnect and isolate when I get depressed and quarantine mimicked the behavior. I didn’t start out feeling depressed; the act of isolation fostered the feeling. So my adjustment to safer at home has come from the acceptance and recognition of depression and taking active measures before it takes root. I'm not ashamed to say I have a therapist and a medication to take as needed.

    As for the level of care and apathy of others? My household is one of loving men and a select group of family/friends have been amazing. We help keep each other put together. Unfortunately, that can't be said for everyone. I've found myself on a few occasions being judged for something I had limited to no control over. Responsibly notifying others of potential exposure has altered or cost friendships. With most things being pushed to the virtual, social media has rarely been a safe haven and apathy and care go both ways. Between the comments of others and reading though the posts of shared loss, I find most days I just can't do it. When I do get on, it’s to like a joke or like a specific post, anything more than a thumbs up, smiley face or a heart, for my own sanity I've just had to scroll past. For those I've had personal connection with, if I missed an important post or a birthday, please accept my sincere apologies. I do what I can to support or listen, but I acknowledge my bouts of disconnect has me more ghost than I'd like.

 

    And then came the fateful day when you tested positive for Covid. Please describe that first day and take us through your experience?

    This will sound odd—the day I tested positive was honestly more of a relief. The test wasn't going to change the outcome, my treatment or preventing spread. I was unable to test the first time. Even working at a hospital as an essential worker and experiencing the complement of symptoms; I was declined twice for testing, which weren't widely available, and the requirements were too stringent. When I caught it the second time, testing positive was confirmation that the symptoms I had the first time were valid. It allowed me to let go of the frustration I had the first time. The first time there was a ton of unknowns, from treatment to spread. At the end of the day, I was still sick, there was no change in treatment, just a comfort in knowing what I was fighting off.    

    You are what is being called a "long hauler.” How long did it take to recover? 

    There were definitely some lessons learned between rounds one and two. My most prevalent symptoms were dehydration, a dry headache and breathing issues. It was like trying to breathe in high elevation—no congestion or anything constricting me, I just wasn't getting full benefit from a deep breath. From the first infection, I had lasting breathing issues for five months. I would get winded super quick. Headaches went away pretty fast, but I find to this day I still run into dehydration issues more quickly than before; the positive to that is I now drink a lot more water, which needed to happen anyway.

    The second time, breathing issues were definitely worse during the infection, I completely lose my sense of smell for a few weeks; it’s been two months I got most my sense of smell back, but find I don't always register foods that are spoiling/spoiled. As for the lessons learned, I never challenged my lungs after the first infection. I got winded quickly and just accepted it; this time, I challenged my lungs immediately afterward. It’s hard, but I still make a conscious effort to take stairs whenever possible, parking way in the back and walking further, doing pushups in my office, etc. It’s the little things here and there got most my lung function back within a month. 

    How much time passed before you were re-infected with Covid? Your thoughts, feelings, experience the second time around?

    Six weeks passed between household infections and about nine months between personal infections. I got it initially in March and my partner got it May. My symptoms were mild to moderate; he was asymptomatic. I had just gotten out of quarantine jail, just to be quarantined six weeks later and I wasn't handling it well. At some point mid-way through the second quarantine, I hit acceptance—sort of. As for my second infection, we all caught it in December as a household; the roommate and partner both got it first, and I got it a week later. The first person to get it was detected by pure luck, as testing was a pre-op requirement and he was scheduled for surgery the next day. It was caught early enough head of time that he was pre-symptomatic for over five days before the initial symptoms kicked in.

    As for the experience, I have to say we had way more adversity the second time around, but we were so much more prepared that it made it manageable. Having it once before I had a fair idea what to expect. It was 2 weeks between initial diagnosis and before my first symptoms showed. We were in the middle of major construction, so I had to get key infrastructure back in place, like a stove and shower. I got all the necessary OTC meds in place, easy digestible foods, electrolytes, soups, touchless thermometers, pulse oximeters to monitor oxygen levels. Had already devised an action plan with my doctor. It was a matter of sleep and manage the symptoms with meds. At its worst, my breathing was not great and I dipped below my defined oxygen thresholds. I knew getting into the ER was difficult, I made the conscious choice to ride it out at home. Outside of being put on a ventilator, with the help of my doc and a 24-hour CVS, I could replicate the standard ER treatment. 

    What was life like in between infections? You purchased a new home—tell us about that.

    Life between infections was as about as busy as you could be in the middle of a pandemic. We bought a house in North Long Beach and it needed major work. We had the stress of getting the house pushed through escrow and getting movers, plus all the hundreds of mini-tasks needed for a house move. It was a stressful time, trying to make it all work on schedule but with lots of balls still in the air.

    We were in the middle of construction when Covid hit. We had exposed walls and no kitchen, and the bathroom just got tiled. Thank God we just got a toilet back. Exit plumbing was complete, but we still had no water fixtures for the bathroom. We had no kitchen sink but still had active plumbing, so with help of a few connectors, I ran a garden hose between the kitchen through the house to the shower. Once quarantine kicked in, no contractors were allowed in or out to finish work. We were basically on pause for a month while the house was near its worst.  

    How are you doing now? Are you out of the woods? What helps you remember your serenity?

    Health wise, we are good. House wise, we are still under construction and the bathroom is done. I’m super-pleased on how it came out. But we are down to subfloor and studs in the kitchen. That will eventually get finished; it’s just a matter of time and money. As for serenity, I mentioned that some good has come from this. I have learned to slow down. My partner and I have been together over four years; this tempered our relationship and I am fortunate to have him in my life. Our roommate is part of the family, plus we inherited a dog in the house move. I've always carried the idea of “The family that is, is the family you make.” I love my family. We have been through a lot in a short period of time. They are my happy place. 

    Do you have words for people who are refusing to take Covid seriously? About Covid protocol? Any words for those who are currently infected with Covid?

    To those not taking it seriously, this doesn't require someone on a soapbox to set this straight—it only requires common sense and decency. Wearing masks, distancing, and not gathering; it’s a major inconvenience but not impossible to do. Have the decency to think outside your personal bubble. We are all impacted by each other’s decisions. Choosing not to adhere may expose ten people. Say one person dies from exposure to Eli, can we tie that to Eli? Not really. They could have also gotten it from Sue and there's no way to definitively know how many each of those ten people Eli exposed will expose others. But what we do know is that if Eli limits his exposure to others by adhering to the basic protocols, that exponential number reduces drastically. Are the masks perfect? Nope. Is social distancing perfect? Nope. Can we limit 100% of our exposure? Realistically, no. But even if all of us doing this only saves one person’s life, and that person is you or a loved one, I'm sure most would agree it’s worth the effort.

    As for those who may be infected, rest, hydrate and take zinc, vitamin C, and vitamin D. Treat the symptoms, have faith and keep a positive outlook. Working with your doctor and having a clear action plan can take the guesswork and fear out of it, as the majority of us are able to recover at home. It's ok to ask for help and if you have a specific faith its ok to ask for prayer. Not all of us have the luxury of close friends, family, stable remote work or reliable housing. What we do have are connections past and present. Trust me when I tell you that I know it's not always easy to reach out. I am a prideful man, which is not always the greatest quality. But if I refuse to reach out to someone in fear of them saying no or worrying how it may look, I will miss out on much needed assistance 100% of the time. Lastly, at my lowest I was reminded by an elder that Belief and Prayer can strengthen my Faith and Faith can get a person through a difficult situation.

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