Innerview with a Unicorn - Haifisch Katczhen, World Pet 2023
As promised on Friday, here is the interview with Haifisch Katzchen, World Pet 2023. I quite enjoyed Haifisch's view on the subject of Pet play and being a world titleholder, and we are lucky to be provided with a wealth of knowledge on the subject of Pet play--it definitely stokes my curiosity and intrigue about the subject.
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NF4F: Please tell us your Pet persona. Where does your Pet name come from? What are your personality traits? How would we see you interact at a bar, mosh or Pride festival? How did you first become aware of the Pet community?
Haifisch: So, I don’t necessarily have a separate pet persona, or name. My scene name is haifisch, which is German for “shark”. I wish I could say there is a profound meaning, but to tell the truth, I was on a Rammstein kick when I entered the community, and their song, Haifisch, always spoke to me. Now over a decade later, it’s nice to have a short and sweet name, even if it comes with difficulties in pronunciation and confusion – why, if I’m a unicorn, do I go by shark?!
I know I said I don’t have a pet persona, and I stand by that. I am always authentically myself, but channeling my unicorn energy allows me to be more confident, extroverted, and unabashed. It gives me the freedom to be loud, outrageous, and over the top. In other settings, such as professionally, I may have to tuck those personality traits away, but knowing that they are still within me gives me a lot of strength in difficult situations.At community events, I will almost always be in very colorful attire, likely with glitter on. I’m not always in full gear (bridle or head harness, horn, etc.) because I don’t believe that gear truly makes the pet. This Pride I decided to step away from my usual gig as a pleasure pony, and carted a small wagon of water and supplies for our Leather contingent during the parade. In mosh settings, I tend to lean more into a facilitator or instigator role. I’m a two legged critter, which means I don’t get down on all fours – partly due to chronic pain, and partly because that’s just not how my headspace works, and that’s okay! It means that I find joy in making sure my fellow pets are hydrated, tossing or kicking balls and toys, scratching bellies and under chins, and waving my mane as an impromptu toy.
I’ve been in the kink community, with an interest in pet play, for over a decade. However, only in the past few years when exploring Leather and Bear spaces did I discover communal spaces between pets, rather than the intimate power dynamics that I was used to.
(Bound to liberation)
NH4F: How does a Unicorn see the world in a way that no other kind of Pet does?
Haifisch: I play the long game. I am protective of those that I love, and come with the horn to prove it. I’m not trainable, nor do I really want to be tamed or handled. But when I truly trust someone, I will let my guard down. No matter what, I hope to spread magic - to let others know that even though you may not see someone else who looks exactly like you, plays like you, or loves like you, you are a valued member of our ecosystem
NH4F: If you were able to describe your experience as a Pet to people outside the community, what would you say? Specifically, can you tell me how you would answer this question if you were talking about a) your in-laws; b) your college friends; and c) your Landlord.
Haifisch: Living in a red state, in our current political climate, I definitely cater my answer to who I’m talking to. WIth my (very Catholic, very conservative) mother-in-law, my description would probably stop at sharing space with friends and community. Thankfully, my husband and I just bought our first house this past May! So there is no longer a landlord involved in our life.
However, speaking with a good friend from college is a conversation that I have had recently, I’ve always preferred to be honest and authentic whenever it is possible, so I shared my community involvement with her as we caught up. It’s a big chunk of my time, energy, and joy, so I wouldn’t have had much to say if I’d left it out! I explained that being a pet for me was not only a large part of how I give back, but also integral to how I live as a queer woman. It has given me family, friendship, and a way to live radically.
(Taking time to enjoy a cupcake)
NH4F: Please tell us about your experience of competing at World Bear Weekend last year? What were the high points? What were some challenges? Did anything surprise you? Do you keep in touch with your class?
Hifisch: It was a fantastic experience! Honestly, traveling with my chosen family to Florida and having them as a support team was one of the biggest highs for me. I knew how important all of these folks were to my life, but being in a pressure cooker environment will always show you who is truly at your side.
The biggest challenge was probably just the longevity of the contest. I very much wanted to do all the things, but having a contest that is three days long meant that I had to pace myself. It’s a lesson I’m glad I learned that weekend, as this past year has been an exercise in balance. In order to best serve my community, I have to protect my own health, which means that prioritization of tasks has to happen. As much as I wish there were multiple of me, we don’t have the technology for it yet.
Surprising is probably not the right word, but it was a relief that I felt at ease in the space created by the World Bear organizers and community. For many reasons, I often question my place in various alternative lifestyle events. However, WBW ensured that I didn’t need to dwell on those thoughts for very long. Being able to lift one another up for our shared Queer identity, rather than tear each other apart for our differences, is currently more vital than ever.
I try to keep in touch as much as possible, and when I’m lucky, I get to see them at events! I know that I’m sometimes terrible at responding to messages on social media, but I’m always grateful to have a group of folks with the same shared experience to bounce ideas off of.
NH4F: What’s something in the Pet community that you think deserves or needs to have a spotlight put on it.
Haifisch: Accessibility, hands down. Many pet events are focused around moshes, which can be inaccessible to those who cannot physically get down on the mats. Those that do not involve moshes are usually held at bars, which may not be tenable for folks who are sober. I try to bring alternate activities to moshes that I help run – catch me at World Bear this year with a grooming station! I want everyone to be able to interact in a way that feels good to their bodies and still allows them to participate.
NH4F: What do we get right about Pets? What do we get wrong?
Haifisch: Since I won my first title, Cincinnati Critter, in 2022, I have had the great joy of meeting so many unique pets and critters. I think in just the past few years, the community is really starting to see that there is more than just Puppy. Titles are changing. Conversations are happening. I get to see lovely humans feel seen and validated in how they play and present. It really means the world to me that Pet and Critter no longer feel like curse words, but the umbrella terms that they are.
I do still feel that there are misconceptions about what is needed to be a pet. I see a lot of emphasis on gear and relationship status. I listen to a lot of folks lament their lack of pack, Handler, Owner, Alpha, etc. I want them to know that whatever creature is in you, it doesn’t have to be represented by an expensive hood or harness. You can be the goodest boy or bestest them without someone’s name on your collar. Hell, you don’t have to have a collar at all. There is still a community here, waiting for you.
(Being a titleholder at every level requires a strong back and strong backing)
NH4F: What’s the best way to vet a Pet?
Haifisch: I mean, if I had it my way, with a rectal thermometer!
Ohhhh, you meant to determine if they are a safer person to play with? This is very personal, and depends on how you are interacting with the individual. I vet people differently for teaching than I do for titles, and look for certain qualities in my friends and play partners that I may not seek in a long term relationship. It may be easier for me to state some of my red flags:
• “I’m down for anything”
• Unwillingness to hear different opinions or life experiences
• Are uninterested in talking to me as a human, due to my gender
• Does not ask for consent before touching me or my gear
NH4F: What have been your favorite places to travel and your favorite events during your title year?
Haifisch: I've
been lucky to travel nearly 13,000 miles during my title year, and to
two new states. A lot of the events I attended were new to me, and I am
so grateful for the opportunity. I have to say, I loved getting to
see Texas for the first time this year. Not only did I get quality time
with my sash sibling who is a resident there, Daddie Danger, but I saw
just how robust a scene both Dallas and Austin have, despite the
political climate that they exist within. My favorite events were
Leather Leadership Conference in Atlanta, Twisted Tryst in Ohio, and
Route 66 Kink Weekend in Oklahoma City. Events where I am surrounded by
diversity, educational opportunities, and Queer joy truly are at the top
of my list.
(Ready for a year like no other)
NH4F: What’s your favorite thing to do on a rainy day?
Haifisch: Get cozy with my dogs and cats under a fuzzy blanket, and mindlessly binge a show. Take a break to cook a warm meal, and connect with my chosen family via the magic that is the internet.
(Family energy)
NH4F: What’s next for you after your year ends?
Haifisch: Well…the work never ends, even if I get to pass on the stole. I may or may not have a five year plan already penned out! The more general ideas for me are to spend some quality time within my relationships, devote more mental bandwidth for local nonprofits that I sit on the board of, and settle into my new house.
Specifically, I can be found at the following for the rest of 2024:
• Cincinnati Leather Weekend, Cincinnati, OH, August 16 - 18th
• Dark Odyssey: Summer Camp, Maryland, August 28th - September 2nd
• Midwest Pet & Handler, Chicago, IL, September 13 - 15th
• Wisconsin Leather Pride, Milwaukee, WI, November 15 -17th
(Ready?)
NH4F: What advice do you have for anyone thinking about running for a Pet title?
Haifisch: Go in expecting three things to go wrong, you’ll be pleasantly surprised when only two happen. Ensure this decision is made with any relationships you may have, as your support people will also be along for the ride. Rehearse and practice everything you can - mock interviews, wardrobe changes, speech, etc.- but be flexible enough to allow for change on the fly.
Be authentically you, and everything else will fall into place.
(Have a great stepaside weekend, Haifisch)
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Photo credits (by order of appearance in article): WBW Event Photographers, Smurfh, Tristan Sutphin, Queen_Bri, Nick Blesik, Daddie Danger.
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Next up: San Diego Pride 50th Anniversary Listicle Article
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